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I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle (1990)

Not Rated | | Comedy, Horror | 1990 (USA)
When a motorbike gang kills an occultist, the evil spirit he was summoning inhabits a damaged bike. The bike is then bought and restored, but reveals its true nature when it tries to exact ... See full summary »

Director:

Dirk Campbell
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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Neil Morrissey ... Noddy
Amanda Noar Amanda Noar ... Kim
Michael Elphick ... Cleaver
Anthony Daniels ... Priest
Andrew Powell Andrew Powell ... Roach
George Rossi ... Chopper
Daniel Peacock Daniel Peacock ... Buzzer
Midge Taylor Midge Taylor ... Toad
David Daker ... Sergeant
Burt Kwouk ... Fu King
Brendan Donnison ... Satanist
Graham Padden Graham Padden ... Dorm
Paula Ann Bland ... Nurse (as Paula-Ann Bland)
Teddie Thompson Teddie Thompson ... Sister
Terence Budd Terence Budd ... Bikes
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Storyline

When a motorbike gang kills an occultist, the evil spirit he was summoning inhabits a damaged bike. The bike is then bought and restored, but reveals its true nature when it tries to exact vengance on the gang, and anyone else who gets in its way. Written by Jim Cheetham <jim@guernsey.net>

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

"The Evil Dead" meets "Carry On Screaming" See more »

Genres:

Comedy | Horror

Certificate:

Not Rated | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

View content advisory »
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Details

Country:

UK

Language:

English

Release Date:

1990 (USA) See more »

Also Known As:

A Minha Moto É Vampira See more »

Company Credits

Production Co:

Dirk Productions Ltd. See more »
Show more on IMDbPro »

Technical Specs

Sound Mix:

Mono

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See full technical specs »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

The location that was used for Noddy and Kim's house is the same one that was used in Series 3 of Boon (1986) for the offices of "Texas Rangers." See more »

Goofs

When Kim (Amanda Noar) brings the cups of tea out to the workshop after Noddy and Buzzer unload the bike from the van, she calls Noddy "Neil" by mistake - Neil Morrissey being the actor's name. He was also Amanda Noar's husband at the time. See more »

Quotes

Receptionist: [At entering the hospital] Yes?
Roach: I appear to have something stuck up my... bottom.
Receptionist: Oh dear. Do you want to wait a bit? Sit down please.
Roach: I'd rather stand.
See more »

Connections

References The Return of the Pink Panther (1975) See more »

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User Reviews

 
"Good" goofy fun.
25 June 2019 | by Hey_SwedenSee all my reviews

A trouble-making biker gang murders some occultists, apparently just for the Hell of it. But the demon that the occultists were summoning enters a damaged Norton Commando motorcycle, which at some point later enters into the possession of a young chap named Noddy (Neil Morrissey, 'Men Behaving Badly'). Soon, it has revealed its true colours: yes, it really does suck blood (you have to see this to believe it), and hates the sunlight! Noddy teams up with a heroic priest (Anthony "C-3PO" Daniels, of all people) to exorcise the demon.

Although this goes on a bit longer than any B movie really should (at an hour and 46 minutes), "I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle" provides outrageous fun as long as the prospective viewer isn't too demanding. It's not for people who ordinarily dislike comedy with their horror, but others will appreciate the fact that it adopts a heavy tongue-in-cheek attitude. It's often quite amusing, especially when the bike gives itself a demonic "makeover". It claims a reasonable amount of victims, in enjoyably gory fashion, and can even scale walls.

The performances are all quite enjoyable. Morrissey is an amiable (if somewhat oblivious at first) lead. Amanda Noar (the real-life Mrs. Morrissey at the time) is an appealing, sexy leading lady. Michael Elphick ("The Element of Crime") is a real hoot as an investigating detective. Daniels likewise tickled this viewers' funny bone. Andrew Powell (as bike gang leader Roach), George Rossi (as his associate Chopper), and the briefly seen Daniel Peacock ("Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves") comprise a good supporting cast. However, if you've heard that Burt "Cato" Kwouk is in this, be advised that his (non-speaking) cameo amounts to very little. (He *does*, however, have a rather unfortunate name that elicits a cheap laugh.)

This little flick is a good candidate for a cult favourite, and it just goes to show that the Brits can pull off this kind of self-aware schlock just as neatly as anyone. It may reek of a minimal budget, but that only adds to the good vibes for any B movie lover.

Seven out of 10.


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