Heidi, a radio DJ, is sent a box containing a record - a "gift from the Lords". The sounds within the grooves trigger flashbacks of her town's violent past. Is Heidi going mad, or are the Lords back to take revenge on Salem, Massachusetts?
Sheri Moon Zombie,
Five carnival workers are kidnapped and held hostage in an abandoned, hellish compound where they are forced to participate in a violent game, the goal of which is to survive twelve hours against a gang of sadistic clowns.
Jeff Daniel Phillips
Two siblings and three of their friends en route to visit their grandfather's grave in Texas end up falling victim to a family of cannibalistic psychopaths And must survive the terrors of leatherface and his family.
In "House of 1000 Corpses", two young couples take a misguided tour onto the back roads of America in search of a local legend known as Dr. Satan. Lost and stranded, they are set upon by a bizarre family of psychotics. Murder, cannibalism and satanic rituals are just a few of the 1000+ horrors that await.Written by
Jerry's right hand jumps on and off his mug between shots. See more »
Attention boils and ghouls, it's time for Dr. Wolfenstein's Creature Feature Show.
Ah! The doctor is in! Don't scream, don't move. Stay tuned for channel 68's Halloween Eve movie marathon! I'm your host, your ghost ghost, with the most, Dr. Wolfenstein! I will be with you until the end!
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After the last scene, the words "The End?" are shown. See more »
The original 105 minute version is out there somewhere but has yet to surface. Rob Zombie has stated that the material is not available. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen. It should be noted however that Zombie willingly cut most of the footage described below while the film was shelved and looking for a distributor. In fact, very little was removed to get an R-rating. See more »
I Wanna Be Loved By You
Written by Bert Kalmar, Harry Ruby and Herbert Stothart
Performed by Helen Kane
Courtesy of Louisiana Red Hot Records under license from Robert Parker Jazz Classics
Use by permission of Edwin H. Morris & Company, A Division of MPL Communications, Inc., Harry Ruby Music c/o The Songwriters Guild Of America,
Larry Spier, Inc. and Warner Bros Inc.
All rights reserved See more »
Anyone who has read my reviews on here prior to this one, and especially people who know me personally will know that I am far from prudish, easily offended or thin skinned. That being said, in my 32 years on this planet I have learned a lot, but realize I still have a lot to learn. I have sat through some of the worst junk the international film community has cranked out, but "House of 1000 Corpses" is far and away the worst movie (I wont honor it to call it a "film") I have had the displeasure to sit through. Clocking in at less than 90 minutes, it drags on forever, making it seem like youve been in the seat for 3+ hours. Its mindless story, ludicrous dialogue, overly profane scripting, and atrocious direction make this one of the biggest losers I have seen grace the silver screen.
Clearly Rob Zombie is a big fan of Tobe Hooper's classic "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" as this movie is basically one long copy of the house sequence in the far superior classic. Throw in a bit of Romero's "living dead", "Resident Evil", "The Serpent and the Rainbow" and shockingly "A Christmas Story" and you have the huge mess this thing is. Storyline appears to be a group of teenagers stumble upon a haunted house style roadside attraction, and in their zest to uncover some information on a local legend, find themselves at the hands of a rather over the top family.
Acting is practially non-existant. Karen Black and Sid Haig should really feel ashamed of their appearances here, and in fact the only redeeming member of the cast is the lovely and quite convincing Sheri Moon as Baby Firefly. The youngest member of this family, she comes across as really psychotic, and hopefully her career will not suffer from her appearance in this.
I have never before seen a movie where the errors in story presented themselves so fast. While referring to the five kidnapped cheerleaders from the local high school...the first line is that they were last seen leaving a football game...in five minutes or less they suddenly have disappeared from a cheering competition. Of course, given the fact that writer/director Rob Zombie is one of the few people on the planet whos lack of talent is exceeded only by his lack of intelligence, this really shouldnt have surprised me. I really dont have time or space to go into all the things I found wrong, but there is at least another full review's worth.
How is it junk like this gets released, yet (for example) George Romero has to beg, plead and whatever else to get "Dead Reckoning" made?? This is prosecution's exhibit #1 that no one really knows how to make a good horror film anymore.
I will now close this with words I have not uttered before. Save your money, don't see this. Save that hour and a half to do something constructive.
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