(TV Series)


Joe Mantegna: Will Girardi


  • Will Girardi : Pop Tarts? Not exactly brain food. Let me make you some eggs.

    Joan : Oh, uh, no time. I have to be in court this afternoon. That sounds so cool, doesn't it?

    Will Girardi : As long as it's not juvie.

    Joan : No. Mock trial. Jack is going down.

  • Will Girardi : Tough going up against the self-defense claim. The giant was chasing Jack, right?

    Joan : That's Jack's story. Everyone takes his word for it because the giant is this total mean, scary ogre, but Jack stole his golden goose.

    Will Girardi : Well, the family was hungry. There are mitigating circumstances.

    Joan : Jack's family is starving, so he trades their only cow in for five crummy beans? Give me a break.

    Will Girardi : Stupidity is not a crime.

    Joan : Maybe he's not stupid. Maybe he knows those beans will take him to the giant's castle.

    Will Girardi : You're arguing it was premeditated.

    Joan : If he was starving, why didn't he harvest the beans? I mean, why did he have to climb that stalk instead?

    Will Girardi : Textbook breaking and entering.

    Joan : Exactly. He takes what he wants, kills the giant, pleads self-defense. Sweet, young Jack is a stone-cold killer.

    Will Girardi : Nice job, counselor.

    Joan : Thank you. You know, you can't take anything at face value. There's always something else going on.

  • Will Girardi : [seeing Carlisle eating platefuls of cake]  Someone rob the Good Humor man?

    Det. Carlisle : Got it from my nephew's birthday. Forgot he's lactose intolerant.

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