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Barely Legal Lesbian Vampires: The Curse of Ed Wood! (2003)

Not Rated | | Comedy, Fantasy, Horror | Video 15 September 2003
Carmilla, the Queen of the Lesbian Vampires, shows the pleasures of girl-on-girl love to sweet young Lilith with depraved vampires of Carmilla's coven. Horror host, Mr. Creeps, brings back ... See full summary »


Tim R. Swartz (as Tim Swartz)


Tim R. Swartz (as Tim Swartz)


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Cast overview, first billed only:
Lolita Langsuir Lolita Langsuir ... Carmilla
Stephanie Bloode Stephanie Bloode ... Lilith
Theda Baire Theda Baire ... The Lover
Circe Circe ... Muffy the Vampire Slayer
Daywalker Daywalker ... Henchman
Didi Delicious Didi Delicious ... Hooker
Tim R. Swartz Tim R. Swartz ... The Tongue (as Tim Swartz)
Zane Ka Zane Ka ... Dungeon Mistress
A. Crowley A. Crowley ... Submissive
Rubberman Rubberman ... Self
Dark Angel Dark Angel ... Coffin Man
Diva Dnine Diva Dnine ... Coffin Girl
Dawn South Dawn South ... Dateless Vampire
Gene Pasadena Gene Pasadena ... Her Date
Lady Dragon Lady Dragon ... Party Vampire Slave


Carmilla, the Queen of the Lesbian Vampires, shows the pleasures of girl-on-girl love to sweet young Lilith with depraved vampires of Carmilla's coven. Horror host, Mr. Creeps, brings back the spirit of Ed Wood to solve the problems of these demented Goth scream queens. Written by tk_sassy

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis


Comedy | Fantasy | Horror


Not Rated






Release Date:

15 September 2003 (USA) See more »

Also Known As:

Barely Legal Lesbian Vampires See more »

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Did You Know?

Crazy Credits

Before the closing credits start, it reads "Pay close attention to the credits! (There will be a test afterward)." See more »


Spoofs Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1992) See more »

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User Reviews

waste of time
22 October 2009 | by rauno-miettinenSee all my reviews

Awful, waste of time. There is no camp or trash value in this one. Seen better amateur movies done by 10 to 12 years old kids in movie clubs.

How on earth someone can spoil movie about vampires and lesbians?

It's not a movie to put together a few vampire / sadomasochism enthusiast in a same room and just shoot it.

Could not find anything good about the film. There was no plot, no real actors, no real special effects, no humor. A few overweight Goths touching each other cannot be called a sex scene. Nothing at all.

Well, cemetery was nice but one should shot a vampire movie during dark.

Purpose was probably good: make a trash movie in a spirit of Ed Wood. Problem is that one cannot make a bad movie intentionally. It takes talent and an effort to make a "real" movie. Ed Wood might have lacked money but he sure had effort. These guys lacked everything. Ed Wood was a genius compared to these guys.

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